On Nov. 9, 1999, art rock and alternative musician Fiona Apple released her second, 42-minute-long studio album, “When the Pawn…” The album title is shortened from the very lengthy, previous Guinness-World-Record-holding title; When The Pawn Hits The Conflict He Thinks Like A King What He Knows Throws The Blows When He Goes To The Fight And He’ll Win The Whole Thing ‘Fore He Enters The Ring There’s No Body To Batter When Your Mind Is Your Might So When You Go Solo, You Hold Your Own Hand And Remember That Depth Is The Greatest Of Heights And If You Know Where You Stand, Then You Know Where To Land And If You Fall It Won’t Matter, Cuz You’ll Know That You’re Right. The 90 word poem was written by Apple herself.
Shortly after release, “When the Pawn…” peaked at #13 on the U.S. Billboard 200 and on Dec. 10, 1999, became certified Gold after selling more than 500,000 units. The release of “When the Pawn…” further anchored Apple into success, alongside her debut album “Tidal,” which resulted in her very first grammy award for Best New Artist in 1998. “When the Pawn…” is Apple’s vengeance and reclamation of what she was criticized for following “Tidal.” Paired alongside the critical and melodramatic lyrics of the album’s contents are deep and bass-filled instruments, such as piano performed by Apple, percussion performed by Butch Norton and Matt Chamberlain, chamberlain strings performed by Patrick Warren and bass guitar, synthesizer and keyboards performed by Jon Brion.
Opening the album with a sharp, brooding and melancholic piano, “On The Bound” sets the tone of the album–vulnerable, critical and story-telling. The song tells of Apple’s struggle with convincing herself that her partner is all she needs in the face of an inevitable and constantly approaching future: “All my life is on me now, Hail the pages turning, And the future’s on the bound.” Throughout the song, Apple goes back and forth between herself: the apparent love and desire she has for her partner: “You’re all I need, you’re all I need,” and her genuine feelings of doubt that contrast her love and desire, repeating throughout the chorus: “Don’t know, should I change my mind? I can’t decide there’s too many variations to consider. No thing I do don’t do no thing but bring me more to do / It’s true, I do imbue my blue unto myself, I make it bitter.” The final lines of the song, repeated throughout the chorus: “And maybe some faith would do me good,” depicts Apple’s yearning for faith in something in her life to hold onto.
“To Your Love” begins with a brooding percussion that is carried throughout the song, pairing with Apple’s struggles of avoidance, bitterness and resentment within a relationship. Opening with, “Here’s another speech you wish I’d swallow / Another cue for you to fold your ears / Another train of thought too hard to follow,” depicts the complicated communication between Apple and her lover–he purposefully ignores her when there is something she has to say, not even fathoming the idea of understanding her: “Am I your gal or should I get out of town? / I just need to be reassured / Do you just deal it out / Or can you deal with all that I lay down?” In the chorus, Apple asks her lover to, “Please, forgive me for my distance / The pain is evident in my existence…The same is manifest in my resistance to your love,” saying to forgive her for feeling how she does in response to her lover’s actions and consideration toward her and their relationship. Her struggle with her lover reflects on herself: “Don’t be down, my demeanor tends to disappoint / It’s hard enough even trying to be civil to myself” conveying Apple’s emotional connection to the relationship. “To Your Love” tells a story of resentment within a relationship, and the brooding instrumental delivers these feelings while and after Apple sings.
The third track, “Limp,” depicts Apple at her wit’s end, fed up with constant gaslighting, use and abuse. Apple and her emotions are exploited to uplift another: “You want the badge of honor when you save my hide…If you need my shame to reclaim your pride.” “Limp” is Apple’s address to those, like the sharks of the music industry or abusive partners, who purposefully and abusively hold her down for their own physical or mental advantages. Apple is aware and angry at the mistreatment she is facing, “You wanna make me sick / You wanna lick my wounds,” “And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists,” “You feed the beast I have within me,” “You fondle my trigger, then you blame my gun,” and “Limp” is her direct, loud and unapologetic proclamation. The chorus: “And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists / I never did anything to you, man / But no matter what I try, you’ll beat me with your bitter lies / So call me crazy, hold me down / Make me cry, get off now, baby / It won’t be long ’til you’ll be lying limp in your own hands” repeats at the end of the song until the last second, solidifying Apple’s stance on how she feels.
Opening with a somber piano, Apple walks through the tale of someone who must move on from the love they once experienced with another in “Love Ridden.” The song has a duration of 3 minutes and 22 seconds, only 12 lyrics being separate from the chorus, which physically and emotionally consists of most of the song. She compares the love she must let go to her birthday candles, wishing for their warmth, instead settling with the idea that chasing said warmth will only “make me colder when it’s over.” Actions that were previously used as endearment reverts to loveless simplicity: “If I need you, I’ll just use your simple name / Only kisses on the cheek from now on / And in a little while, we’ll only have to wave / My hand won’t hold you down no more.” After failed attempts to halt the end of the relationship, she accepts what she believes is meant to be and continues her life: “The path is clear to follow through / I stood too long in the way of the door / And now I’m giving up on you.”
“Paper Bag” follows as the fifth track, which remains one of her most popular songs, earning Apple a Grammy nomination for Best Female Rock Vocal Performance in 2001. “Paper Bag” tells a story of a bird being mistaken for a paper bag, representing the disappointment in seeing hope:“And I believed for a moment that my chances were / Approaching to be grabbed, but as it came down near, so did a weary tear / I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag,” “And I went crazy, again today, looking for a strand to climb / Looking for a little hope.” She daydreams in hope for the boy she is always imagining to manifest in her life, to no avail: “I was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy / Whose reality, I knew, was a hopeless to be had.” This daydream contrasts what she experiences in her real life, which is a boy who believes everything is all in her head: “I said, honey, I don’t feel so good, don’t feel justified…He said it’s all in your head / And I said so’s everything, but he didn’t get it / I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy.” They’re clearly incompatible, but Apple can not accept it. She settles for what she receives in hopes to fill the void she daydreams of: “Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh, it kills…Hunger hurts, but starving / It works when it costs too much to love.”
A personal favorite, “A Mistake” takes off with a groovy yet dark synthesizer. Apple sings of her imminent desire to fall outside of the lines and break the rules, opening with: “I’m gonna make a mistake / I’m gonna do it on purpose / ‘Cause I’m full as a tick / And Im scratching at the surface.” Instead, she can’t seem to break out of her mold as she has before. “And when the day is done and I look back / And the fact is I had fun…All the advice I shunned and I ran / Where they told me not to run,” “I’m always doing what I think I should / Almost always doing everybody good / Why?” Apple acknowledges that she has accidentally made mistakes, going against the expectations of others. But now, she wishes to make mistakes purposefully, defying the “right way” to do things in a “why not” fashion. The instrumental continues a minute after Apple finishes singing, leaving those who listen to feel as she does, unsettled and contemplative.
Another personal favorite, “Fast as You Can” begins with rapid percussion, somewhat foreshadowing the incoming consuming and ungrounded lyrics. Apple explores the ups and downs of a relationship. The beginning and ending of the song are rapid and erratic, leaving the middle of the song to be slower, reclusive and poignant. She settles for the present power imbalance within her relationship, asking for an escape and distraction within her relationship: “Yeah, I’ll be your girl, if you say it’s a gift / And you give me some more of your drugs / Yeah, I’ll be your pet, if you just tell me its a gift / ‘Cause Im tired of ‘why’s choking on ‘why’s.” Then, in an instant, she returns to the previous fast-paced and deterrent attitude as before: “I even tried forgiving him, but it’s too soon / So i’ll fight again, again, again, again, again…Fast as you can, baby / Wait, watch me, I’ll be out.” She relishes in her criticizing state, desiring to be left alone in warning of the “tick” she believes herself to be.
“The Way Things Are” serves as Apple’s statement of solitude. Throughout the song, she states her content with being without someone and the complicating closeness and intimacy they bring, and she wouldn’t even know what to do in the situation where she was to be with someone: “I wouldn’t know what to do with another chance / If you gave it to me / I couldn’t take the embrace of a real romance…I’m much better off / With the way things are.” Apple recognizes the intense criticism she faces both within the situation of a relationship as well as in the industry, and turns an eye to it, not letting any of it discourage her: “So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on / And I’ll keep kicking the crap ‘til it’s gone / If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle / And as soon as I settle, I bet i’ll be able to move on.” Apple grows in her solace, learning to accept her solitude.
“Get Gone” is, by far, the loudest expression of rage, anger and self respect on “When The Pawn…” She begins with a simple and quiet piano melody, performed by Apple herself. However, the lyrics contrast to the [currently] quiet instrumental. Apple begins the song by confronting toxicity: “How many times do I have to say / To get away, get gone.” She recognizes what she has been put through, realizes her self worth and begins to leave a toxic relationship behind. She calls out the foolishness of her toxic partner: “So put away that meat you’re selling.” The repetitive, suffocating and toxic cycles of the relationship she is in tires her and Apple is confronted with her only option–to get rid of him: “F-cking go / ‘Cause I’ve done what I could for you / And I do know what’s good for me.”
On the final track of the album, “I Know,” Apple is the “other woman.” The love she wishes to pursue is forbidden, and throughout the song, she makes this very apparent: “And I will pretend / That I don’t know of your sins…But all the time, all the time / I’ll know, I’ll know.” She remains compliant and patient in the bitter triangle, letting her desired lover know she will always be waiting, “And you’ve early close your curtains / I’ll wait by the backstage door,” “And if it gets too late for me to wait / For you to find you love me, and tell me so / It’s okay.” The final moments of the song emphasize the sadness yet acceptance in Apple’s decisions. “It’s okay / Don’t need to say it,” and in the beats after her final words, it is almost as if there is an empty space fit for “I know.” It’s okay, and they don’t need to say it, because she knows. And as she resonates in her acceptance, a soft and brooding piano melody fades out, concluding the album.
The impact of Fiona Apple’s “When The Pawn…” struck audiences upon release and continues to do so through the intense storytelling that borrows heavily from Apple’s own life and experiences. Alongside other female artists, Apple’s discography helped define spaces for the women shunned for their outlet of emotion and anger in the late 1990’s, inspiring those to embrace and create similar spaces years in the future. Writing and creating albums like “Tidal” and “When The Pawn” before the age of 23 emphasizes the genius and uniqueness of Fiona Apple and the powerful and emotional messages she conveys through her music.
